Relic Hunter’s Toybox
by Aaron "BLU3" - 10 years ago show comments
You looking for something special? Got that new boosted 90 that you want to stand out? Perhaps you want to disappear from sight? Never mind that shoddy looking oil lamp. What you need is a true treasure. Not sure where to start? Come with me, and I will show you some great items that will make your adventures that much grander. Join us weekly as we scour the lands of Azeroth and beyond for those special items. I, BLU3 the Relic Hunter, will be your guide to these mysterious items. Welcome to the Relic Hunter’s Toybox. 
Past
Yes, what do we have here? Let me blow the dust off this item and see what we’ve got… Cleansed Timberling Heart? Hmm, it seems to be some kind of seed. Oh yes, I found this while I was helping out Denalan in Teldrassil. I came across Blackmoss the Fetid. He was a strange creature that reminded me more of Swamp Thing than a tree, but such is the woe of a cursed tree. When I slew him, I was rewarded with a disgusting black moss heart that was still beating. With a little help from Denalan, we were able to purify it. Denalan told me that once planted I would have a loyal companion. He sadly said that being a plant he would be limited to the land he was planted in. His lifespan would also be quite short; only around 20 minutes. The seed gains strength from the person who plants it though. No need to use it right away for fear of it being unable to keep up in higher levels. I have heard others have used him to help out the last little bit on a tough boss. I personally have not decided how I will use mine. It is a once in a lifetime item. No matter how hard I try, I will never get another. That is part of its charm though, deciding when to finally plant this seed. 
Present
Look at this great item I recently uncovered. Turnip Paint “Gun” I was helping Li Li out with some vermin in the Valley of the Four Winds. She repaid me with this beautiful item. I have to admit I keep it around more for nostalgia then use. Li Li was just too cute and fun questing with. I bring this item out and it makes me smile thinking of all the fun we had tricking those virmen. I, however, have come up with a few fun uses for this item. Who hasn’t had some gold beggar that just didn’t get the hint? Take this bad boy out and let them have it. Then you can say something like “Oh, did you say gold? Well orange is close enough.” Do you have a buddy with one too? How about a paint ball session in your favorite town. The first one to get shot with paint is the loser. I am certain Li Li would approve of both scenarios.
Future
Let me look into my Patchy Crystal to try and scry for a great item we may yet discover. Hmm… this is odd… I have found reference to a mysterious item. The details are very fuzzy. An error of “SPELL_FAILED_CUSTOM_ERROR210: Can only be used on AFK players” has been discovered. What kind of effect will only work on AFK players? I will put this info into the Grand Specula-tron 5000. Let’s see what we get: oh, very interesting. It seems to be a “PUNT ME” sign. It gives the player a clickable effect of punting the player, much like the Puntable Marmot. What is this? I am getting some kind of sportscast on this item. What could it be? Why, it is the gnome punt world cup! The Ironforge Hammers are facing off against the Stormwind Knights. Oh look! Gnomercy has fallen asleep. Can the Ironforge Hammers get the sign on and punt before he wakes. Yes! They have done it! And just look at the distance that gnome went! That will give the Ironforge Hammers a nice lead. Wow, what a game! You will have that to look forward to, so I won’t spoil how it ends.
See you next week!
Glad you could join me! Keep your eyes open and your hands quick. You never know when you will see that next rare item. If you find any great items you want spotlighted feel free to leave a comment.
